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Star Wars if…

I’m not a Star Wars person, never have been, but I still find today’s announcement that George Lucas has sold Lucasfilm (and all associated bits and pieces) to Disney really interesting. Almost as interesting is that they are proceeding with and ‘Episode 7’ with a view to make more in the future.

I joked on twitter that while Lucas said that he would never make Episodes 7,8 and 9 that he never specified that he wouldn’t sell his company and let someone else make them … then George said pretty much exactly the same thing.

I still question why you would refer to it as “Episode 7”, why not completely restart with fresh characters from the same universe - why not just keep it completely separate from the originals?

Lots of people I follow on twitter (pretty much all of them actually) are Star Wars fans of some description - and the general consensus is that while they are quite surprised by the announcement they don’t necessarily have negative feeling about it. In fact many seem enthused by the prospect of a Star Wars film that George Lucas isn’t at the helm for.

They all have their own preferences for who they’d like to see in the director’s (and/or writer’s) chair - although I have my doubts that any of the names being thrown around would actually get the gig. There are numerous reasons for this, some of these guys are likely huge Star Wars fans and wouldn’t want to risk screwing it up, some are involved in other ‘competing’ projects and some maybe wouldn’t be interested at all.

So what if the names being thrown around this morning got a hold of the reins for Episode 7 and beyond? (Slightly tongue in cheek…)

Christopher Nolan.

Skywalker begins.
The Dark Lord.
The Dark Lord Rises.

But, I doubt he’d be up for another big trilogy.

JJ Abrams.

Something with spies, and monsters, and secrets, and islands, and infinite layers of mystery that may never be explained…

But he’s already doing Star Trek and that’s with Paramount. Not going to happen.

Joss Whedon.

Darth Vader vs Iron Man. Chewbacca vs Hulk. Princess Leia vs Black Widow.

Episode 7 is apparently being targeted at 2015, which just so happens to be the same time as Avengers 2. So Whedon is out.

David Fincher.

Something dark about a kid who is taught about something called ‘the force’ by this eccentric green dyslexic midget who he later discovers was all just a figment of his imagination but not before he’s found the head of his sister in a box and posted about it on an online community that he whipped up in-between lessons. Swords made of light. Pfft. As if that’s realistic.

I’d still like to see him do the two sequels to “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo”, which would probably overlap with the Episode 7 timeline. That aside, I’d happily watch a Start Wars film that he was in charge of.

Michael Bay.

So, Stars Wars is no longer set in space. They’re now mutant reptiles that live in the sewers. Obi Wan is now a giant rat. Oh and robots, lots of robots. Oh, oh and explosions. EVERYTHINGS EXPLODES.

No. Just no.

Brad Bird.

The Skywalkers. They’ve all got super powers, and they’re animated. It’s the Pixer/Star Wars film you’ve all wanted for so long.

Maybe, but I doubt we’ll see a Pixar version while Clone Wars is still kicking.

Tim Burton.

Johnny Depp is Darth Vader. Helena Bonham Carter is Padme. It’s all stop-motion animation. And it’s going to be worse than Episode 1.
I love most Tim Burton films, but he’d be a terrible choice for Star Wars.

Jon Favreau.

It could be like Cowboys and Aliens, without the Cowboys, and with a better story. That and he kick-started the current Marvel run with the first Iron Man film, which is still the best of the Marvel films - with Avengers the only possible exception.

Damon Lindelof.

As writer, not director. I throw this one in simply because I love how pissed off Alien fans were with Prometheus. I love how many people are still (unjustifiably) pissed at him for how Lost ended. And he’s just written something mysterious called ‘1952’ - to be directed by Brad Bird - for, yes, you guessed it, Disney.